My novel - PLEASE READ

[DYRE]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

Yes we are having a little fun.

But heres a book you should have

I can count at least two mistakes in that post.

EDIT: Red Dragon beat me to it, and Valk beat him to it.

[JPS]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

Oh, simple man edited his post, it said a few harsher things then just USE GRAMMAR

[Libby]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

OMG YOU GUYS ARE SO MEAN I THINK IM GUNNA COVER MYSELF IN 100% ALCAHOL (whatever way u spell it) AND THROW A MATCH ON ME...... ugh plus ill i "DID" was ask you if you "WANTED" to make a game i "WASNT" telling you to... and then you give me crap Intstead of braking me down help me i never say stuff like that to your posts ugh whatever

And this is why I could never take you seriously. Your novel idea (and I did review it again with a bit more clarity, even though I really don't like you.) is way too cliche and disjointed. And to automatically assume that people are being harmful is rediculous(sp?). The way you react to honest critism is absolutely juvinile, and sometimes I wonder why you stay around the Pav if you are not willing to take honest crits. If you would just take a breath and actually READ some of the posts, some people are TRYING to give you some good advice. My advice? Grow up a bit before you go around trying to make novels and games. Am I saying this to hurt you? No, I'm speaking from experiance. ANYONE can be an author, but it takes someone special to be a "writer," just like anyone can draw, but not everyone can be an "artist."

Being able to have a mature and comprehensive story takes maturity and the ability to understand and take any critism that comes your way. I have had people here at the Pav give me honest critism about some of my art, and it hurt a bit, it stung, but you know what? I learned from it and I tried to see what everyone's problem was with it. That is the most important part of writing- Understanding your audience and adapting your ideas in a way they can understand it.

My critique- Your idea lacks anything new, and I would pass this up even if I was required to read it for a class. It has alot of potienial, but seeing how you are on the Pav, I don't think you are ready to do anything with it yet. Give yourself a few years and concentrate on writing things that are not so involved or contriversial.

My advice - If you don't want people's opinions, don't share the damn idea. If you don't feel you want to write for anyone but yourself, just write it and don't share. It'll save you alot of pain in the long run. I feel a real writer is one who has an idea, and wants to share it through that particular medium, in order to inspire others. You, on the other hand, seem to do it for attention. This is not the path to good writing, it's just the path to vanity presses. Check out a book from the library on writing. A good book is "How to Write Fantasy and Science Fiction" by Orson Scott Card (of Ender's Game game.) and you can actually get it for pretty cheap on Amazon.

Bottom line. GROW UP. If I knew how to put this in bigger text, I would. I do NOT mean this in a harmful way. Just take a breath and read my way-too long post. I promise you'll get some good out of it. Mature before you leap, and people will like you better.

[JPS]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

Yeah I agree with Libra, you cant expect to post a story idea up here and expect everyone to say "that sounds awesome, great work!", especially with your track record here...

[Misty]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

I agree with Libby as well. She's only giving you tough love.

[Valkysas]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

Bottom line. GROW UP. If I knew how to put this in bigger text, I would.

select the text, click where it says "2" up there next to the font name, and select a larger number from the drop-down list.

it will then look like this.

[Red Dragon]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

The way Valk said it was kinda confusing. You most likely got it but I wanted to make a guide anyhow





I HOPE YOU CAN SEE THIS BECAUSE I AM DOING IT AS HARD AS I CAN

[JPS]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

Somehow RD it seems the pictures made it even more confusing, for me anyways, I think Valk couldnt have explained it any better personally

You may have to go into

User CP ->
Options ->
Message Editor Interface

and select "Standard Editor" if you cannot see the options to enlarge your text

[DBtheProdigy]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

Well i tryed to get the what's it called? Oh yes the "Grammar check for Internet 7" is what it's called. I tryed to download it but it says somthing like "An error occured while initializing files" so I cant do it. ALSO THE NEXT TIME SOMEONE SHOWS ME THAT ORANGE GRAMMAR BOOK (I've seen it more than 20 times) IM GOING FIND EVERY SINGLE BOOK THATS EVER BEEN WRITEN AND BURN THEM!!!! And to coming to my novel, Yes I will agree my ideas are a little umm Out There I guess I could say. So i trashed it and now i dont know what to fix so I haven't worked on it in a while; SO i could use help with it, well if you want to help that is. And yes I tryed to use correct grammar tell me how i did !!!! thanks.

[Loki]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

Well i tryed to get the what's it called? Oh yes the "Grammar check for Internet 7" is what it's called. I tryed to download it but it says somthing like "An error occured while initializing files" so I cant do it.

You don't need a program to use good grammer. In fact, the gammer editor in MSWord is often wrong because it doesn't understand the context of what you're writing.

ALSO THE NEXT TIME SOMEONE SHOWS ME THAT ORANGE GRAMMAR BOOK (I've seen it more than 20 times) IM GOING FIND EVERY SINGLE BOOK THATS EVER BEEN WRITEN AND BURN THEM!!!!

Forget that orange book. The Elements of Style is all you need.

And yes I tryed to use correct grammar tell me how i did !!!! thanks.

Not very well, I'm afraid.

[DBtheProdigy]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

Hmmm really? What did I do wrong?

[Loki]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

Well i tryed to get the what's it called? Oh yes the "Grammar check for Internet 7" is what it's called. I tryed to download it but it says somthing like "An error occured while initializing files" so I cant do it. ALSO THE NEXT TIME SOMEONE SHOWS ME THAT ORANGE GRAMMAR BOOK (I've seen it more than 20 times) IM GOING FIND EVERY SINGLE BOOK THATS EVER BEEN WRITEN AND BURN THEM!!!! And to coming to my novel, Yes I will agree my ideas are a little umm Out There I guess I could say. So i trashed it and now i dont know what to fix so I haven't worked on it in a while; SO i could use help with it, well if you want to help that is. And yes I tryed to use correct grammar tell me how i did !!!! thanks.

The best way would be for me to rewrite your post, I think.

Well I [Always capitalize the word "I"] tried [Not "tryed"] to get the... [This really isn't an error, but it captures the casual voice you're writing with] what's it called? Oh yes, "Grammar check for Internet 7." [Only put "the" if it's the definite article] ["is what it's called" is redundant] I tried to download it but it says something like "An error occurred while initializing files" so I can't do it. ALSO, THE NEXT TIME SOMEONE SHOWS ME THAT ORANGE GRAMMAR BOOK (I've seen it more than 20 times) I'M GOING FIND EVERY SINGLE BOOK THATS EVER BEEN WRITEN AND BURN THEM! [This is tricky, technically more than one punctuation mark is incorrect, but here you're using it for emphasis which, along with the all caps you also used, is common internet shorthand. I took it out regardless.] ["And to" doesn't make any sense. You just need "Coming to".] Coming to my novel, yes [Only capitalize letters at the start of sentences, unless they are proper names] I will agree my ideas are a little... umm... out there I guess. ["I could say" is redundant and it reads strange] So I trashed it and now I don’t know what to fix. [Run-on sentence. Each sentence should only incorporate one idea. All theses "so's" are unnecessary. Just put a period and start a new sentence.] I haven't worked on it in a while. [Why did you use a semicolon here?] I could use help with it... well if you want to help that is. And yes I tried to use correct grammar. [Two sentences here.] Tell me how I did! [Don't nest emoticons inside sentences.] Thanks.

Now it reads:

Well I tried to get the... what's it called? Oh yes, "Grammar check for Internet 7." I tried to download it but it says something like "An error occurred while initializing files" so I can't do it. ALSO, THE NEXT TIME SOMEONE SHOWS ME THAT ORANGE GRAMMAR BOOK (I've seen it more than 20 times) I'M GOING FIND EVERY SINGLE BOOK THATS EVER BEEN WRITEN AND BURN THEM! Coming to my novel, yes I will agree my ideas are a little... umm... out there I guess. So I trashed it and now I don’t know what to fix. I haven't worked on it in a while. I could use help with it... well if you want to help that is. And yes I tried to use correct grammar. Tell me how I did! Thanks.

It still reads strange in some places, but the gammar is much better.

[JPS]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

The fact that you arent taking offense to being told your grammar is a little off is definitely a plus in my book

Your grammar was a little off, but I understood everything you were trying to say, so I dont really care if things were in context or not IMO.

[DBtheProdigy]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

yeah i guess so and plus it really was an error i couldnt remember for like a second. lol

[Loki]

Re: My novel - PLEASE READ

What did I just say about capitalizing "I"s.

I wonder why I even bothered.