Re: Anyone know about the fan made zelda movie???
Now? I think he's been a joke for a while.
Poor simple man, bearing the crushing brunt of the misguided comments from his fellow Pavvies. simple man came here with a dream, a dream that most of those under the age of 15 generally tend to carry with them. This is the dream of creating a truly epic story, involving good and evil, right and wrong, treants and necromancers. His dream even extended so far as to include any pavvie who made a slightly positive remark about his grand idea, in order to bestow upon them this greatest of honors, an honor simple man dreamed up all by himself, the supreme honor of being included in the epic struggle of a boy named Ivan and his trials and tribulations in a town simply known as TwiggerTree.
However, his dream was shattered when one of the pavvies upon whom this tremendous honor was bestowed turned his back on him and his epic work in progress and began to aim cutting remarks at him. This pavvie was named Irate Giraffe, but due to some sentimental reason, simple man decided to continue having atreides figure as a prominent character in this thought-provoking drama that will go on to explore the shame and embarrasment that necromancers endure in their day to day lives. The struggles of Ivan and atreides would serve as a catalyst to tell a story with much greater meaning, one which I'm sure all of us has grappled with at some point in time in our lives, and that is the story of why these regal beings known in this action-packed thrillride as necromancers came to be one with that dark side of their psyches, and began to reanimate the dead until they might one day have enough power backing them in order to be able to take back their spiritual homeland TwiggerTree from the heathen treants.
But using necromancers in his story, simple man is really subtly commenting on the fragile balance between life and death, the very thin line that exists between being a corpse resting peacefully in a grave covered with flowers placed by loved ones who are still mourning their sudden untimely passing, and being a corpse that has been torn asunder from the fragrant earth with only one purpose etched into their lifeless brains, and that is to put an end to the treant menace once and for all. For once this deed is done, they may return once more to their final resting places, satisfied in knowing that even in death, they have served a noble purpose, with that purpose being to have helped the necromancers gain their rightful place in the order of ALL THINGS, to have helped them rise up proud from the generations of torment and suffering they have undergone at the hands (erm..branches) of their sworn enemies, the loathesome treants.
*****Spoilers below******
Ivan becomes an unwitting pawn in this eternal struggle to define the boundaries within which society at large must strive to break from in order to emerge with an understanding of the rights that the dead inherently have. Ivan, during the course of his travails, comes across a forlorn, sad, decrepit, maggot-infested, rotting, shell of a former Mr. Universe, and becomes fast friends with the corpse, who the player (and Ivan) will not learn until many more hours into the game, in a surprise twist, is in fact Ivan's long lost identical twin brother Navi who had in fact been conceived many years before Ivan became the unholy union of his father(who was a necromancer)'s sperm, and his mother(who tended to wounded llamas)'s egg, and who died when Ivan was the tender age of 118 months old. Many heartfelt (and some may argue, bordering on homoerotic) hugs were exchanged between the two as they became fast companions. But when they venture to a town which shall remain nameless at this point in order to preserve the surprise awaiting there, they encounter an angry mob of disgruntled NPCs, who demand retribution for the senseless slaughter of all their pet llamas at the hand of one of the undead, who apparently was not buried with his spectacles, and mistook walking trees with shaggy beasts of burden. An impromptu trial was quickly enacted, in which the NPCs argued that even though Navi was not the corpse who has engaged in the mass llama genocide, he would make a good substitute for executing all their primal tendencies for revenge, as it was argued in a debate (which lasts for 20 minutes in real time using RPGM3's storytellers) that the undead, being incapable of rational thought, and being guided only by the animal instincts instilled in them by their creators, do not have the same rights as a living human being, and can therefore can have revenge enacted upon them without a fear of retribution.
At this point in the story, Ivan comes into his own, and grows from the clueless little boy who conversed with small woodland creatures, as depicted in Loki's comic, to a man almost the equal of his long lost twin brother who used to be Mr. Universe before his death, but was now a run-of-the-mill corpse.
Through clenched teeth, he relays the story of how, after the initial hugs, they both realized that they made up two parts of the same being, and as such completed each other. They then decided to consummate their relationship, which is enacted in a suprisingly well written (for a 13 year old) and erotic storyteller that lasts for 45 minutes in real time. After the act is done, Navi broke down and sobbed uncontrollably, as he truly now believed he was going to go directly to hell for having had incestuous relations with his long lost identical twin brother. And gay ones at that. But more importantly, he regretted taking the innocence of one as young as Ivan, and possibly skewing his view on the sex act forever from that day forward. And on top of that, he feared jailtime, as Ivan was jailbait.
After the entire flashback is told, Ivan proclaims that Navi should indeed have the rights of a living human being, as he is able to feel regret, remorse, fear, and on top of that has a categorically theological viewpoint on the afterlife. The NPCs are hushed into a stunned silence as they review the evidence laid before them. In the end, in a shocking twist ending to this unfathomably epic tale, one designed to even outdo FFVII, the NPCs come to understand all the conflicted emotions Navi was feeling, and decide to draw and quarter Ivan for being such a desirable young tease, and leading Navi on in an untoward manner not befitting of someone of his tender age.
After a brief 15 minute storyteller explaining the events just after Ivan's tragic demise, atreides makes a surprising reappearance to detail the basic premise of the expected sequel (how could you NOT have a sequel to something this heartfelt and tear-jerking?), in which the necromancers have to adjust their magic-using abilities to now take into account the suddenly liberated undead contingent. It is an epic tale told against the backdrop of war, pestilence, famine, fear, bloodshed, and, if you search closely, an easter egg field filled with rainbows, unicorns, and lollipops. Ivan's scattered pieces of flesh are cloned by a mysterious scientist who warped in from the 23rd century, and are formed into an entirely new entity known simply as Solid Ivan. As a final teaser, atreides hints that he will reappear in the sequel, but will be more morally ambiguous this time, deepening his character, and causing the player to empathize with him to the point of shedding tears at the discovery of his tragic secret.
*****end spoilers******
But according to his forum, simple man is not going to start work on this groundbreaking sequel, and is instead going to devote his full attentions to some game about a quest for crack.
Seriously, simple man, I have but one question for you......WTF?
Originally posted by jvrlopez
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Poor simple man, bearing the crushing brunt of the misguided comments from his fellow Pavvies. simple man came here with a dream, a dream that most of those under the age of 15 generally tend to carry with them. This is the dream of creating a truly epic story, involving good and evil, right and wrong, treants and necromancers. His dream even extended so far as to include any pavvie who made a slightly positive remark about his grand idea, in order to bestow upon them this greatest of honors, an honor simple man dreamed up all by himself, the supreme honor of being included in the epic struggle of a boy named Ivan and his trials and tribulations in a town simply known as TwiggerTree.
However, his dream was shattered when one of the pavvies upon whom this tremendous honor was bestowed turned his back on him and his epic work in progress and began to aim cutting remarks at him. This pavvie was named Irate Giraffe, but due to some sentimental reason, simple man decided to continue having atreides figure as a prominent character in this thought-provoking drama that will go on to explore the shame and embarrasment that necromancers endure in their day to day lives. The struggles of Ivan and atreides would serve as a catalyst to tell a story with much greater meaning, one which I'm sure all of us has grappled with at some point in time in our lives, and that is the story of why these regal beings known in this action-packed thrillride as necromancers came to be one with that dark side of their psyches, and began to reanimate the dead until they might one day have enough power backing them in order to be able to take back their spiritual homeland TwiggerTree from the heathen treants.
But using necromancers in his story, simple man is really subtly commenting on the fragile balance between life and death, the very thin line that exists between being a corpse resting peacefully in a grave covered with flowers placed by loved ones who are still mourning their sudden untimely passing, and being a corpse that has been torn asunder from the fragrant earth with only one purpose etched into their lifeless brains, and that is to put an end to the treant menace once and for all. For once this deed is done, they may return once more to their final resting places, satisfied in knowing that even in death, they have served a noble purpose, with that purpose being to have helped the necromancers gain their rightful place in the order of ALL THINGS, to have helped them rise up proud from the generations of torment and suffering they have undergone at the hands (erm..branches) of their sworn enemies, the loathesome treants.
*****Spoilers below******
Ivan becomes an unwitting pawn in this eternal struggle to define the boundaries within which society at large must strive to break from in order to emerge with an understanding of the rights that the dead inherently have. Ivan, during the course of his travails, comes across a forlorn, sad, decrepit, maggot-infested, rotting, shell of a former Mr. Universe, and becomes fast friends with the corpse, who the player (and Ivan) will not learn until many more hours into the game, in a surprise twist, is in fact Ivan's long lost identical twin brother Navi who had in fact been conceived many years before Ivan became the unholy union of his father(who was a necromancer)'s sperm, and his mother(who tended to wounded llamas)'s egg, and who died when Ivan was the tender age of 118 months old. Many heartfelt (and some may argue, bordering on homoerotic) hugs were exchanged between the two as they became fast companions. But when they venture to a town which shall remain nameless at this point in order to preserve the surprise awaiting there, they encounter an angry mob of disgruntled NPCs, who demand retribution for the senseless slaughter of all their pet llamas at the hand of one of the undead, who apparently was not buried with his spectacles, and mistook walking trees with shaggy beasts of burden. An impromptu trial was quickly enacted, in which the NPCs argued that even though Navi was not the corpse who has engaged in the mass llama genocide, he would make a good substitute for executing all their primal tendencies for revenge, as it was argued in a debate (which lasts for 20 minutes in real time using RPGM3's storytellers) that the undead, being incapable of rational thought, and being guided only by the animal instincts instilled in them by their creators, do not have the same rights as a living human being, and can therefore can have revenge enacted upon them without a fear of retribution.
At this point in the story, Ivan comes into his own, and grows from the clueless little boy who conversed with small woodland creatures, as depicted in Loki's comic, to a man almost the equal of his long lost twin brother who used to be Mr. Universe before his death, but was now a run-of-the-mill corpse.
Through clenched teeth, he relays the story of how, after the initial hugs, they both realized that they made up two parts of the same being, and as such completed each other. They then decided to consummate their relationship, which is enacted in a suprisingly well written (for a 13 year old) and erotic storyteller that lasts for 45 minutes in real time. After the act is done, Navi broke down and sobbed uncontrollably, as he truly now believed he was going to go directly to hell for having had incestuous relations with his long lost identical twin brother. And gay ones at that. But more importantly, he regretted taking the innocence of one as young as Ivan, and possibly skewing his view on the sex act forever from that day forward. And on top of that, he feared jailtime, as Ivan was jailbait.
After the entire flashback is told, Ivan proclaims that Navi should indeed have the rights of a living human being, as he is able to feel regret, remorse, fear, and on top of that has a categorically theological viewpoint on the afterlife. The NPCs are hushed into a stunned silence as they review the evidence laid before them. In the end, in a shocking twist ending to this unfathomably epic tale, one designed to even outdo FFVII, the NPCs come to understand all the conflicted emotions Navi was feeling, and decide to draw and quarter Ivan for being such a desirable young tease, and leading Navi on in an untoward manner not befitting of someone of his tender age.
After a brief 15 minute storyteller explaining the events just after Ivan's tragic demise, atreides makes a surprising reappearance to detail the basic premise of the expected sequel (how could you NOT have a sequel to something this heartfelt and tear-jerking?), in which the necromancers have to adjust their magic-using abilities to now take into account the suddenly liberated undead contingent. It is an epic tale told against the backdrop of war, pestilence, famine, fear, bloodshed, and, if you search closely, an easter egg field filled with rainbows, unicorns, and lollipops. Ivan's scattered pieces of flesh are cloned by a mysterious scientist who warped in from the 23rd century, and are formed into an entirely new entity known simply as Solid Ivan. As a final teaser, atreides hints that he will reappear in the sequel, but will be more morally ambiguous this time, deepening his character, and causing the player to empathize with him to the point of shedding tears at the discovery of his tragic secret.
*****end spoilers******
But according to his forum, simple man is not going to start work on this groundbreaking sequel, and is instead going to devote his full attentions to some game about a quest for crack.
Seriously, simple man, I have but one question for you......WTF?
Man, that was a slight...peversion...of simple mans orginial plot.
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