Okay, so today was a gift exchange within my department at work. My manager, Dave, got my name.
Now, first of all you have to know that the names were drawn when it was still November, and at least a week before December, so there was plenty of time to get a gift. Secondly, I have known my manager for about 40 minutes, including my job interview and the meeting we all had last month. Thirdly, and most importantly, he forgot all about the gift exchange.
This being so, he ran downstairs to the ground floor of our building and to the convenience store disguised as a gift shop. It has the world's tackiest crap ever. Like, huge angel statues with rainbow glittering fairy wings, and clocks that no one in their right mind would want in their home. GAUDY CRAP.
I imagine that he randomly selected my gifts.
This is not a joke. He gave these to me in all seriousness, although he seemed somewhat embarrassed and apologized for them.
First off, a lovely house for my boxes of Kleenex:
That would look lovely in an old lady's bathroom, wouldn't it? Here's a closeup of the fantastic detail:
OOOOOOO, craptacular! <3 But that's not all!
I also received a fabulous country-style mug holder:
With the price tag conveniently still attached!
How wonderful!
There was also a tiny blinking Santa pin, one of those red ones that could give a person seizures. Wasn't that thoughtful of him? Totally. They say it's the thought that counts, but what if there was absolutely no thought put into it whatsoever? Great managerial skills, Dave. I'm gonna pray to God you don't draw my name again next year, genius.
Of course, the purpose of this is not to rant about the crappy gifts I got. I actually think it's ****ing hilarious, although I'm slightly sad that everyone but me got very nice gifts that were thoughtful and pretty. I mean, even in a pinch a box of chocolates works fine, and he could have asked any of my coworkers what I'm interested in rather than deciding I have the tastes of an old lady.
See, I'm wondering if anyone can give me suggestions on the most creative and fun ways to rid myself of or destroy these abominations. I'd like to burn them, personally, but I'm open to suggestions!
Discuss.
Also, feel free to take this opportunity to talk about or display crappy gifts you yourself have received over the years or recently, so we can all laugh/cry/destroy together.
Now, first of all you have to know that the names were drawn when it was still November, and at least a week before December, so there was plenty of time to get a gift. Secondly, I have known my manager for about 40 minutes, including my job interview and the meeting we all had last month. Thirdly, and most importantly, he forgot all about the gift exchange.
This being so, he ran downstairs to the ground floor of our building and to the convenience store disguised as a gift shop. It has the world's tackiest crap ever. Like, huge angel statues with rainbow glittering fairy wings, and clocks that no one in their right mind would want in their home. GAUDY CRAP.
I imagine that he randomly selected my gifts.
This is not a joke. He gave these to me in all seriousness, although he seemed somewhat embarrassed and apologized for them.
First off, a lovely house for my boxes of Kleenex:
That would look lovely in an old lady's bathroom, wouldn't it? Here's a closeup of the fantastic detail:
OOOOOOO, craptacular! <3 But that's not all!
I also received a fabulous country-style mug holder:
With the price tag conveniently still attached!
How wonderful!
There was also a tiny blinking Santa pin, one of those red ones that could give a person seizures. Wasn't that thoughtful of him? Totally. They say it's the thought that counts, but what if there was absolutely no thought put into it whatsoever? Great managerial skills, Dave. I'm gonna pray to God you don't draw my name again next year, genius.
Of course, the purpose of this is not to rant about the crappy gifts I got. I actually think it's ****ing hilarious, although I'm slightly sad that everyone but me got very nice gifts that were thoughtful and pretty. I mean, even in a pinch a box of chocolates works fine, and he could have asked any of my coworkers what I'm interested in rather than deciding I have the tastes of an old lady.
See, I'm wondering if anyone can give me suggestions on the most creative and fun ways to rid myself of or destroy these abominations. I'd like to burn them, personally, but I'm open to suggestions!
Discuss.
Also, feel free to take this opportunity to talk about or display crappy gifts you yourself have received over the years or recently, so we can all laugh/cry/destroy together.
I would just like to see the house-hat.
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