I found an old notebook today that contined a story I had started in the summer of 2000 when I was coming up with the idea of Luner Pandemonium. Of course it was terrible, but it had some neat ideas I had compleatly forgotten about. So I revised and expanded it and here it is.
On Stoves
Some claimed that the stove in the desert nation of Kalah was the greatest in the world. Many aspiring chefs, cooks, and confectioners traveled the vast sands with dreams of creating the perfect dish with it. It was also of great interest to many masons and stoneworkers, not only for its size and unique dimensions, but also for the fact that it was carved out of a single stone. According to Kalah legend the great sun god Ruyan could not consume any food before his great power turned the food to ash in his mouth. Constantly starving, Ruyan took revenge on the land itself. He proclaimed that no food would grow until he was fed. Thus the great desert of Kalah was created and would stay an arid wasteland until Ruyan’s belly was filed. During the reign of Great King Kalah Krim the First an idea of restoring the land to the fertile paradise it once was came to the venerable ruler. King Krim sought to appease Ruyan by having a large stove built out of a massive bolder. Capable of creating great temperatures the stove was used by the royal chefs to create dishes of heat unforeseen on earth before. They created dishes so hot that they would be able to withstand Ruyan’s own overwhelming temperature. But despite how many times these feasts of superheated food were sacrificed to Ruyan the desert remained as inhospitable as ever. King Krim declared the stove a failure, had its builders beheaded, and declared that Ruyan’s stove (as it came to be called) never be used again. Of course as the centuries passed King Krim’s declaration was overturned and now days the stove is used to feed the entire royal palace.
However despite it’s fantastic design and elaborate history Ruyan’s stove was not the greatest in the world.
In the frozen Greenspan Mountains of the far north an underground hot spring melted the frozen ice and snow above it and created a giant cloud of steam that could be seen for miles. To the wild men of the mountains this never moving, never changing cloud was thought to be home to the gods. It was a sacred and forbidden place that no man was allowed near. For years no one approached it until a youth by the name of Nikona sought to appease the gods to bring his betrothed back to life. He sneaked off one night disobeying the orders of the holy men of his tribe and headed north to the cloud. He traveled for days, refusing to hunt or eat, least the gods deemed him unworthy of his wish. On the fourth night he reached the cloud and found no gods to beg favors. No gods sitting on thrones of blood and bone. No gods hunting with their great beasts and birds. Instead he found that inside the cloud there was no cold. He discovered that he could strip out of his skins and fur and was in no danger from the bitter wind. Nearly starving, he went and killed a buck and carried the carcass back to the cloud to skin and clean it in the warm air. He ate and prayed and finally slept in this holy place. In the morning he discovered that his love had not been returned to him. Instead he found that throughout the night the steam had cooked the uneaten venison and, taking a bit of some, Nikona found that it had been infused with the taste of winter.
And yet, not even this natural wonder was the greatest stove in the world.
Few know about The Caves of Crystal and their inhabitants the Dorn. They are a seclusive race that never visit the surface of the earth. They live on underground fungi, night crawlers, and blind cave fish. However, once a day a beam of sunlight finds a crack in the soil and through it travels into the realm of the Dorn. It bounces from crystal to crystal into a large spherical room covered in tiny mirror-like snails. These snails’ create shells of a high reflective properties so that they may hid amongst the crystals of the caverns and this spherical room is their natural breeding ground. The sunlight reflects and refracts from snail to snail where its multiplied force is so strong it could cook an entire cow in five minutes. Not that the Dorn would ever risk an expedition to the surface to find a cow and drag it back through the tunnels and crawls and tight spaces to the cooking sphere, but the fact remains. Instead they use it to create great feasts of cavefish and centipedes which they dine on alone in their dark kingdom.
Though truly impressive, the Dorn’s sphere filled with snails and sun could not claim the title of “the best.” Only one tool for the addition of heat to food was above all others. It was simply known as The Stove and it carried no great distinction or fame. The world’s greatest chefs did not seek it out. It was not considered the home of the gods. It was not the chance occurrence between the celestial movements of the sun and the libidos of snails. It was simply used to cook food and it was loved by only one man.
The Stove was the heart of The Keep’s kitchen. It was said to be made of the same dragon bones that made up the rest of The Keep. But when visitors came to view The Keep’s ribcage bridge, spinal towers, or horn throne, The Stone was never included amongst these wonders. Though, from the roar of The Stone’s flames, it was said to be the only part of The Keep where the spirit of the dragons still remained. It stood in the center of the kitchen and each of its four iron doors faced a different direction. The northern facing door was known by The Keep’s cooks as the baker’s door. All manner of breeds and cakes were cooked in it and the smell that emanated from the northern door was of cinnamon and dough. Facing the west was the farmer’s door where vegetables and eggs were steamed and fried. Though on special occasions it was known to house stuffed peppers and delicate mushrooms. The southern door belonged to the butchers. Here beef and pork met a tasty and toasty end. Fish was fried and mutton roasted and the sputtering of grease could be heard throughout the kitchen. Lastly, to the east faced the hunter’s door and here multitudes of fowl roasted on rotating spits. Chicken, quail, and dove here waited to meet the potatoes and greens being cooked to the west. From The Stove came a cornucopia of smells and odors so that if one wished they could circle The Stove and be treated to all fragments that one could ever hope to ever experience.
In fact this traversal of The Stove was the favorite pastime of Chef Chop. He would circle The Stove on pretense of overlooking his cook’s progress but in reality he was partaking the pleasant vapors from each door. He would often stop to offer his opinion on what spice should be used or what length of time a dish should be cooked but his mind was never far from the odors The Stove offered him. Master Chop loved it in The Keep’s kitchen. Not only was he ruler of this domain with hundreds of cooks under his charge, but he was also keeper of The Stove. To him there could be no higher honor and he often considered himself luckier than the king. It was only Chef Chop who knew the truth. Only he knew that though it served a utilitarian purpose The Stove was the greatest in the world, and that he was its keeper and protector. What he didn’t know, however, is that it would soon be taken away from him, and through his quest to reclaim it the fate of the Kingdom was held in the balance.
On Stoves
Some claimed that the stove in the desert nation of Kalah was the greatest in the world. Many aspiring chefs, cooks, and confectioners traveled the vast sands with dreams of creating the perfect dish with it. It was also of great interest to many masons and stoneworkers, not only for its size and unique dimensions, but also for the fact that it was carved out of a single stone. According to Kalah legend the great sun god Ruyan could not consume any food before his great power turned the food to ash in his mouth. Constantly starving, Ruyan took revenge on the land itself. He proclaimed that no food would grow until he was fed. Thus the great desert of Kalah was created and would stay an arid wasteland until Ruyan’s belly was filed. During the reign of Great King Kalah Krim the First an idea of restoring the land to the fertile paradise it once was came to the venerable ruler. King Krim sought to appease Ruyan by having a large stove built out of a massive bolder. Capable of creating great temperatures the stove was used by the royal chefs to create dishes of heat unforeseen on earth before. They created dishes so hot that they would be able to withstand Ruyan’s own overwhelming temperature. But despite how many times these feasts of superheated food were sacrificed to Ruyan the desert remained as inhospitable as ever. King Krim declared the stove a failure, had its builders beheaded, and declared that Ruyan’s stove (as it came to be called) never be used again. Of course as the centuries passed King Krim’s declaration was overturned and now days the stove is used to feed the entire royal palace.
However despite it’s fantastic design and elaborate history Ruyan’s stove was not the greatest in the world.
In the frozen Greenspan Mountains of the far north an underground hot spring melted the frozen ice and snow above it and created a giant cloud of steam that could be seen for miles. To the wild men of the mountains this never moving, never changing cloud was thought to be home to the gods. It was a sacred and forbidden place that no man was allowed near. For years no one approached it until a youth by the name of Nikona sought to appease the gods to bring his betrothed back to life. He sneaked off one night disobeying the orders of the holy men of his tribe and headed north to the cloud. He traveled for days, refusing to hunt or eat, least the gods deemed him unworthy of his wish. On the fourth night he reached the cloud and found no gods to beg favors. No gods sitting on thrones of blood and bone. No gods hunting with their great beasts and birds. Instead he found that inside the cloud there was no cold. He discovered that he could strip out of his skins and fur and was in no danger from the bitter wind. Nearly starving, he went and killed a buck and carried the carcass back to the cloud to skin and clean it in the warm air. He ate and prayed and finally slept in this holy place. In the morning he discovered that his love had not been returned to him. Instead he found that throughout the night the steam had cooked the uneaten venison and, taking a bit of some, Nikona found that it had been infused with the taste of winter.
And yet, not even this natural wonder was the greatest stove in the world.
Few know about The Caves of Crystal and their inhabitants the Dorn. They are a seclusive race that never visit the surface of the earth. They live on underground fungi, night crawlers, and blind cave fish. However, once a day a beam of sunlight finds a crack in the soil and through it travels into the realm of the Dorn. It bounces from crystal to crystal into a large spherical room covered in tiny mirror-like snails. These snails’ create shells of a high reflective properties so that they may hid amongst the crystals of the caverns and this spherical room is their natural breeding ground. The sunlight reflects and refracts from snail to snail where its multiplied force is so strong it could cook an entire cow in five minutes. Not that the Dorn would ever risk an expedition to the surface to find a cow and drag it back through the tunnels and crawls and tight spaces to the cooking sphere, but the fact remains. Instead they use it to create great feasts of cavefish and centipedes which they dine on alone in their dark kingdom.
Though truly impressive, the Dorn’s sphere filled with snails and sun could not claim the title of “the best.” Only one tool for the addition of heat to food was above all others. It was simply known as The Stove and it carried no great distinction or fame. The world’s greatest chefs did not seek it out. It was not considered the home of the gods. It was not the chance occurrence between the celestial movements of the sun and the libidos of snails. It was simply used to cook food and it was loved by only one man.
The Stove was the heart of The Keep’s kitchen. It was said to be made of the same dragon bones that made up the rest of The Keep. But when visitors came to view The Keep’s ribcage bridge, spinal towers, or horn throne, The Stone was never included amongst these wonders. Though, from the roar of The Stone’s flames, it was said to be the only part of The Keep where the spirit of the dragons still remained. It stood in the center of the kitchen and each of its four iron doors faced a different direction. The northern facing door was known by The Keep’s cooks as the baker’s door. All manner of breeds and cakes were cooked in it and the smell that emanated from the northern door was of cinnamon and dough. Facing the west was the farmer’s door where vegetables and eggs were steamed and fried. Though on special occasions it was known to house stuffed peppers and delicate mushrooms. The southern door belonged to the butchers. Here beef and pork met a tasty and toasty end. Fish was fried and mutton roasted and the sputtering of grease could be heard throughout the kitchen. Lastly, to the east faced the hunter’s door and here multitudes of fowl roasted on rotating spits. Chicken, quail, and dove here waited to meet the potatoes and greens being cooked to the west. From The Stove came a cornucopia of smells and odors so that if one wished they could circle The Stove and be treated to all fragments that one could ever hope to ever experience.
In fact this traversal of The Stove was the favorite pastime of Chef Chop. He would circle The Stove on pretense of overlooking his cook’s progress but in reality he was partaking the pleasant vapors from each door. He would often stop to offer his opinion on what spice should be used or what length of time a dish should be cooked but his mind was never far from the odors The Stove offered him. Master Chop loved it in The Keep’s kitchen. Not only was he ruler of this domain with hundreds of cooks under his charge, but he was also keeper of The Stove. To him there could be no higher honor and he often considered himself luckier than the king. It was only Chef Chop who knew the truth. Only he knew that though it served a utilitarian purpose The Stove was the greatest in the world, and that he was its keeper and protector. What he didn’t know, however, is that it would soon be taken away from him, and through his quest to reclaim it the fate of the Kingdom was held in the balance.
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