Booby Trap: now available for purchase!

[Sejon]

Click here to order:

http://www.lulu.com/content/426476

[Smurvis]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

I'd have a child just so I could read them this book in a few years. It's THAT good.

[IRC]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

It's very good.

[Chrono]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

It's incredible, the colors are so vivid. Are you going to publish this?

[gray]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

where's my copy?!?!

[BIOHUNTERZ]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

I have a feeling sejon is about to become filthy rich from royalties.

[IRC]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

I want to offer some constructive critiscm if I may. First of all the illustrations are awesome. Really top knotch stuff. But I feel you could play with the dialouge a bit and maybe emphasis the moral of the story a bit more. Right now it feels to me a bit like there's no point except for telling the story of these birds on an island.

Also I think you should think about extending the last page where the reader is provided information about the island and the birds. I think you could take up three or four more pages with info. Maybe add some more animals to the actual plot or something.

But really this is just really good stuff.

[hitogoroshi]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

Yeah, I'm also glad that hes not afraid to use words beyond the "this is a red fire truck" stage of vocabulary. Very good kids book.

[Jamos' Old Account]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

If for some reason you don't get super rich from this, I'm going to be ****ed. Its ****ing awesome! I wish I was a kid again just so I could read it in public and not get funny looks from people.

[Sejon]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

IRC, I can understand where you're coming from for the most part.

Initially I had plans of using a few other animals as characters, such as the crab. I also wanted to have individual characters -- there was going to be an old crotchety booby and a young energetic booby, and the frigate birds were going to have a specific leader, and I would have given the names.
I had also planned out a brief "history" of the booby bird species when they were going to be introduced, specifically dealing with the origin of the name "booby" (they would land on Spanish vessels in colonial times and become easy food for the sailors).
I also would have liked to have done more information on the island itself at the end of the book -- as it stands now it's just that one page, which is actually going to be the back cover of the book.

Unfortunately, this book was originally an assignment for an Illustration class and I was stuck to a page limit. Everytime I wanted to flesh something out, the teacher would tell me to excise a bunch of stuff and simplify it for a more "general audience" (as he'd always say). In the process, the boobies and frigate birds became collective groups as opposed to having individual characters among them. I bickered about it at first, but after a while the super-simplicity grew on me, so I don't mind it nearly as much as I used to.
I think, if anything, this serves as a good introductory book, and after I see how it's received, I'll consider delving into more stories that are at least somewhat more plot-heavy and character-driven (I am exceptionally tempted for the next one to be about my samurai mongoose, for example :P).

Anyway, thanks for the comments, everyone.

[Feros]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

Fantastic!

And because someone has to be immature about it...
*ahem* Teehee...boobies.

[Caciss]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

Damn, very tight.

[ErikaFuzzbottom]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

Hmm, my only problem is that the text on the page with the frigates landing on the whale is rather dark for where it's sitting. White text might be better.

[Sejon]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

I already noticed that shortly after posting it up, and lightened the water so the text stands out better.

[IRC]

Re: Booby Trap Children's Book: Mission Comprete!

IRC, I can understand where you're coming from for the most part.

Initially I had plans of using a few other animals as characters, such as the crab. I also wanted to have individual characters -- there was going to be an old crotchety booby and a young energetic booby, and the frigate birds were going to have a specific leader, and I would have given the names.
I had also planned out a brief "history" of the booby bird species when they were going to be introduced, specifically dealing with the origin of the name "booby" (they would land on Spanish vessels in colonial times and become easy food for the sailors).
I also would have liked to have done more information on the island itself at the end of the book -- as it stands now it's just that one page, which is actually going to be the back cover of the book.

Unfortunately, this book was originally an assignment for an Illustration class and I was stuck to a page limit. Everytime I wanted to flesh something out, the teacher would tell me to excise a bunch of stuff and simplify it for a more "general audience" (as he'd always say). In the process, the boobies and frigate birds became collective groups as opposed to having individual characters among them. I bickered about it at first, but after a while the super-simplicity grew on me, so I don't mind it nearly as much as I used to.
I think, if anything, this serves as a good introductory book, and after I see how it's received, I'll consider delving into more stories that are at least somewhat more plot-heavy and character-driven (I am exceptionally tempted for the next one to be about my samurai mongoose, for example :P).

Anyway, thanks for the comments, everyone.

Good thing your teacher did or you'd be the only guy with a 1000 page story skeleton for a children's book.