Had to write some poems for my college Creative Writing class a while ago. I make no claims to actual skill in this area and just post these out of boredom. Also very little thought was put into 'em (as with all my homework). I am not a writer and never want to be one. 
Italisized = not part of the poem.
Warning Label
Warning:
Product may cause nausea, vomiting, or yeast infection
Ebola, dementia, or birth from using no protection
It may cause hearing loss, or even feeling loss, or rectal inflammation
It may cause death, halitosis, or a powerful hallucination
In rare cases it may cause cancer, dry mouth, painful water retention
Pimples and/or warts, even the lack of the simplest comprehension
Shrinking, insanity, fainting, constipation, or failed digestion
Stupidity, longevity, or make you ask a stupid question
Arthritis, menopause, it can worsen a lung condition
Gangrene, heart attack, psychosis, and/or lack of ambition
It may cause asthma, a sore throat, or a hepatitis affliction
Coma, deathly poisoning, paranoia, or a crucifixion
So before you take our great runny nose medication
Please read the labels that are required by our nation
Google'ing for rhyming dictionaries FTW!
Haiku
Writer’s block sets in
Fighting for inspiration
My mind draws a blank
(Haikus in my opion are the cheapest form of poetry. I had to turn in 6 poems and I couldn't think of one so I made this Haiku about my lack of being able to think of something)
How Do I Write A Poem?
How do I write a poem?
Is it supposed to rhyme?
Is there a rhythm unseen?
Is there a pattern divine?
Does it make one smile?
Is it supposed to have feeling?
Does it make one frown?
Is it for secret concealing?
Is it supposed to make sense?
Is it supposed to confuse?
Does it have a point?
Is it meant to muse?
Oh, it can be anything?
Great!
Another poem I wrote from not being able to think of anything. I wrote these poems like a few hours before they were due. Procrastination for the win!
The Pinkish Bull
Alone I sat one mystic eve
Alone I sat, alone to grieve
For someone stole my pinkish bull
Leaving me but to brood my full
Alone I searched throughout the land
This search containing just one man
Nobody believed the bull existed
They had though my mind all shrewd and twisted
The pinkish bull exists I say!
I just saw it just yesterday!
Claimed him as mine, then somebody stole!
Some mome, some fool, some cold-blooded troll
To the ends of the earth I searched all day
Hawaii, Laos, Atlantis, Pompeii
The Sun, the Moon, Venus and Mars
Across the globe, across the stars
Until finally I had found him where?
I followed the tracks of his pinkish hair
To the pearly white gold gates of heaven above!
Across from a Wal-Mart is the Kingdom of Love!
God stole my pinkish bull, whatever will I do?
No sooner did I think this did God say, “Hey you!”
With a thunderous voice that could shatter steel
He said, “I need a vacation, take the wheel!”
And that’s when I became God for a day.
So what did I do? Nothing too cliché.
I turned all my kith into pinkish bulls for a while.
And continued my godly work with my pinkish bull and a smile.
Inspired by “A Purple Cow” by Gelett Burgess and “God’s Wheel” by Shel Silverstein. Shel Silverstein had those crazy poem books I loved as a kid. That's all I've read about poems too lol.
Kith can mean friends and family. That line with the word confuses people.
I post these 'cause I'm bored. You wouldn't believe how bored I am. I don't even really like poems much at all. lol
Italisized = not part of the poem.
Warning Label
Warning:
Product may cause nausea, vomiting, or yeast infection
Ebola, dementia, or birth from using no protection
It may cause hearing loss, or even feeling loss, or rectal inflammation
It may cause death, halitosis, or a powerful hallucination
In rare cases it may cause cancer, dry mouth, painful water retention
Pimples and/or warts, even the lack of the simplest comprehension
Shrinking, insanity, fainting, constipation, or failed digestion
Stupidity, longevity, or make you ask a stupid question
Arthritis, menopause, it can worsen a lung condition
Gangrene, heart attack, psychosis, and/or lack of ambition
It may cause asthma, a sore throat, or a hepatitis affliction
Coma, deathly poisoning, paranoia, or a crucifixion
So before you take our great runny nose medication
Please read the labels that are required by our nation
Google'ing for rhyming dictionaries FTW!
Haiku
Writer’s block sets in
Fighting for inspiration
My mind draws a blank
(Haikus in my opion are the cheapest form of poetry. I had to turn in 6 poems and I couldn't think of one so I made this Haiku about my lack of being able to think of something)
How Do I Write A Poem?
How do I write a poem?
Is it supposed to rhyme?
Is there a rhythm unseen?
Is there a pattern divine?
Does it make one smile?
Is it supposed to have feeling?
Does it make one frown?
Is it for secret concealing?
Is it supposed to make sense?
Is it supposed to confuse?
Does it have a point?
Is it meant to muse?
Oh, it can be anything?
Great!
Another poem I wrote from not being able to think of anything. I wrote these poems like a few hours before they were due. Procrastination for the win!
The Pinkish Bull
Alone I sat one mystic eve
Alone I sat, alone to grieve
For someone stole my pinkish bull
Leaving me but to brood my full
Alone I searched throughout the land
This search containing just one man
Nobody believed the bull existed
They had though my mind all shrewd and twisted
The pinkish bull exists I say!
I just saw it just yesterday!
Claimed him as mine, then somebody stole!
Some mome, some fool, some cold-blooded troll
To the ends of the earth I searched all day
Hawaii, Laos, Atlantis, Pompeii
The Sun, the Moon, Venus and Mars
Across the globe, across the stars
Until finally I had found him where?
I followed the tracks of his pinkish hair
To the pearly white gold gates of heaven above!
Across from a Wal-Mart is the Kingdom of Love!
God stole my pinkish bull, whatever will I do?
No sooner did I think this did God say, “Hey you!”
With a thunderous voice that could shatter steel
He said, “I need a vacation, take the wheel!”
And that’s when I became God for a day.
So what did I do? Nothing too cliché.
I turned all my kith into pinkish bulls for a while.
And continued my godly work with my pinkish bull and a smile.
Inspired by “A Purple Cow” by Gelett Burgess and “God’s Wheel” by Shel Silverstein. Shel Silverstein had those crazy poem books I loved as a kid. That's all I've read about poems too lol.
Kith can mean friends and family. That line with the word confuses people.
I post these 'cause I'm bored. You wouldn't believe how bored I am. I don't even really like poems much at all. lol
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