Well, I don't know where to begin.
How to Be a Man began as a monthly column in a local newspaper, co-authored by myself and a friend of mine. We started it around January and had a minor following. When we both moved to seperate states it seemed How to Be a Man had come to it's conclusion.
It is a long time after this and my friend and I discussed working on the book. The comprehensive guide (Well, semi-comprehensive as there is room for a sequel which is already plotted out.) to being a "real manly man." As progress is slow since my friend's computer got a certain college liquid spilled on it and does not work, and me with class 40 hours a week and a game to design and develop. But I decided to post an excerpt here from what is about 10% of a first draft done.
What though, could complement a flannel properly? Many materials have been put to the test and failed. The fine texture of velvet fell short. The material of the corduroys simply could not hold up. The finest of khakis simply did not match the coarse manliness of a flannel. Who then, would accompany the warmth, splendor and functionality of a flannel? But of course, denim could ride a man below the waist. Yes men, jeans were the answer. You probably saw them on a cowboy, a lumberjack or a steel mill worker. If you have seen anything in two of three said locations, it is a good bet that it is quite a manly article.
In a male dominated world, it is clear to see that jeans have caught on. Everybody wants to be a man, but few achieve the manliest of status. It is a scientific fact that women want to be men and some try harder than others, and they pony themselves up in nice denim jeans and cut their hair as short as possible. Some even go so far as to have sex with other women, having sex with women being quite a manly ideal. This is called penis envy, as explained by Sigmund Freud in the Oedipus complex. This basic principle explains that when females are born, they have a lack of a penis, thus initiating the Oedipus complex. Unfortunately, since they will never have a penis by natural means, this induces the penis envy. If this conflict is not resolved than it can result in women wearing jeans, work boots, short hair-cuts and in some extreme cases, a sex change operation.
Women aside, jeans are the perfect compliment to a good flannel. They are rugged. Even when a good pair of jeans has begun to rip, a real man will still wear them. Why? Why would a man reveal himself like this? The answer is simple. Jeans remain tough in the face of adversity. Yes, jeans still provide more protection against sparks, hack saw accidents and raging cows than any other pair of pants that exist no matter how ripped and tattered they may be. It is science. Take, for example, this case argument from real news which really happened in reality not too long ago.
And that's it, folks. I don't want to divulge too much, and this really isn't the best part, but why would I give that away?
How to Be a Man began as a monthly column in a local newspaper, co-authored by myself and a friend of mine. We started it around January and had a minor following. When we both moved to seperate states it seemed How to Be a Man had come to it's conclusion.
It is a long time after this and my friend and I discussed working on the book. The comprehensive guide (Well, semi-comprehensive as there is room for a sequel which is already plotted out.) to being a "real manly man." As progress is slow since my friend's computer got a certain college liquid spilled on it and does not work, and me with class 40 hours a week and a game to design and develop. But I decided to post an excerpt here from what is about 10% of a first draft done.
What though, could complement a flannel properly? Many materials have been put to the test and failed. The fine texture of velvet fell short. The material of the corduroys simply could not hold up. The finest of khakis simply did not match the coarse manliness of a flannel. Who then, would accompany the warmth, splendor and functionality of a flannel? But of course, denim could ride a man below the waist. Yes men, jeans were the answer. You probably saw them on a cowboy, a lumberjack or a steel mill worker. If you have seen anything in two of three said locations, it is a good bet that it is quite a manly article.
In a male dominated world, it is clear to see that jeans have caught on. Everybody wants to be a man, but few achieve the manliest of status. It is a scientific fact that women want to be men and some try harder than others, and they pony themselves up in nice denim jeans and cut their hair as short as possible. Some even go so far as to have sex with other women, having sex with women being quite a manly ideal. This is called penis envy, as explained by Sigmund Freud in the Oedipus complex. This basic principle explains that when females are born, they have a lack of a penis, thus initiating the Oedipus complex. Unfortunately, since they will never have a penis by natural means, this induces the penis envy. If this conflict is not resolved than it can result in women wearing jeans, work boots, short hair-cuts and in some extreme cases, a sex change operation.
Women aside, jeans are the perfect compliment to a good flannel. They are rugged. Even when a good pair of jeans has begun to rip, a real man will still wear them. Why? Why would a man reveal himself like this? The answer is simple. Jeans remain tough in the face of adversity. Yes, jeans still provide more protection against sparks, hack saw accidents and raging cows than any other pair of pants that exist no matter how ripped and tattered they may be. It is science. Take, for example, this case argument from real news which really happened in reality not too long ago.
And that's it, folks. I don't want to divulge too much, and this really isn't the best part, but why would I give that away?
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