My Series Folklore *updated 3/7*

[Maijo]

Check out this short film I made. This isn't my first foray into the film "scene" but all the same, I'd like to get some feedback on this thing I've concocted up.

Folklore- Chili For the Rest of Us

[Big Rick Cook]

Re: My Short Film

Wow. Thank you for wasting my time.

Points of interest: struggling to get your shirt back on was kinda funny, and the way you ended it was great. Otherwise, it was way too long, the chili didn't cook long enough for how it looked when it came out of the can (unless you have a super microwave), and it was BORING. And you need to compensate for how dark it was in some scenes with actual lighting of some sort.

That is all.

[highwind]

Re: My Short Film

I'm a film major.

So here's some constructive things you can learn from.

First of all, nothing happens for the first 5 minutes. At all. And when I say "nothing" I mean that there's no conflict. In a short film like this, you need to establish conflict within the first minute or else you'll bore the viewer.

Another thing that will have a huge impact on picking up the pace is tighter editting. The editting is really really loose in this. There are empty frames in pretty much every shot.

What I mean by this is if you're walking into the shot, you need to begin the shot with you already in the shot. It could be your shoulder or your head. Whatever. You just can't have a completely empty frame.

The same goes for leaving the frame. Don't leave the frame and let the shot hang there for a second. Cut it with part of you still in the frame.

Music would also help a lot. The rule of film is that it's 75% audio and 25% video. When you have nothing but ambient noise for the whole thing, you're leaving out the main component of film.

I hope this helps.

P.S. your house is really really nice. I've never seen such a cool microwave.

[Big Rick Cook]

Re: My Short Film

Thanks, Highwind. You put what I said in film terms quite well. I don't know the first thing about actually MAKING a film.

[Red Dragon]

Re: My Short Film

Im sorry im sorry i just couldn't stand watching it anymore after a few minutes...

[Maijo]

Re: My Short Film

I took all the criticism to heart and just made a revamp, re-edit using all your criticism. I'm gonna post it later and I'd like to see if I'm understanding your help in any way.

By the way, thanks for the input. It helps more than ever you could know.

[josh]

Re: My Short Film

that was horrible. bad sound, bad lighting, bad editing. it was painfully boring.
I agree with highwind, audio is half the picture, and the uneven background noise makes it hard to watch. if all you were going for was the final struggle at the end (which, by the way, makes no sense), then you could have breezed through the first five minutes of cooking monotony in less than thirty seconds with some simple cuts.
if you want to know what I mean, check out Evil Dead 2, Army of Darkness, or Shaun of the Dead.
I'm not trying to sound like a dick but as a fellow filmmaker, I understand that criticism is everything and very necessary.

also, there were several times when I noticed the camera went out of focus. work on that a little more. and for the love of God, white balance! or turn more lights on.

[d2king10]

Re: My Short Film

Some of the camera angles were rather nice.

[Maijo]

Re: My Short Film

[Chrome Homura]

Re: My Short Film

NO! No smiley for you! Bad maijo, BAD!

[Alex]

Re: My Short Film

Is this the sort of stuff you have to deal with in your life?

Man, you've got it rough.

[Red Dragon]

Re: My Short Film

WHERE ARE THE NINJAS!!!!!!!!!!!

[Maijo]

Re: My Short Film

Wait until the next episode comes out and then you'll see.

And trust me, in the second installment the pace picks up and all I have to say is you won't guess what happens next.

[SERGE]

Re: My Short Film

Hey Maijo good work!
Remember you are a young guy just starting out and thats a lot better than I could have ever done at that age.
You look like you're having fun and thats what film is about,everyone has at least 30 bad films in them I am on my 24th lol.
Keep it up man I look forward to seeing your progress!

[neobi]

Re: My Short Film

remind me to never buy hormel chili. YUCK!!! and I work in a grocery store. Yeah it pretty much bored the hell out of me. Oh well...