Disgusting new food item(s) of the week~

[Nixon]

On occasion I find myself trying out some pretty weird stuff.

I will now attempt to document my findings. You are welcome to add any information about various new/odd foods you have tried recently.

And I don't want any serious foods. This should be stuff that even little kids are wary of.

It doesn't have to be candy, but man is there a lot of weird candy out there.

That being said, I will start with this: Marshmallow Ice Cream Cones-
http://www.clorders.com/pics/bestsweetmarshmallow.jpg

First off, I can't distinguish a real flavor with these things. They almost taste kind of like cotton candy and vanilla, but more bland. They leave a very funky aftertaste in my mouth, and even for marshmellows they have a strange consistency. I think I can feel them doing horrible things to my stomach already!

Overall score: 4/10

Second entry: Fruit Leather-
http://a1468.g.akamai.net/f/1468/580/1d/pics.drugstore.com/prodimg/137831/200.jpg

This is much better. Like a really dry fruit roll up, but a nice flavor overall. Interesting texture... Probably better for me than anything else I've eaten today.

Overall score: 7/10

[The Toecutter]

Never tried it, never intend to try it, but you may want to give 'potted meat' a whirl.

http://www.thesneeze.com/art/potted_meat/potted.jpg
http://www.pazen.com/house8/ralphs_potted_meat.jpg

Here's a taste test from some site:

http://www.thesneeze.com/mt-archives/cat_steve_dont_eat_it.php

Potted Meat Food Product

There aren't too many products that feel the need to reassure you that they are, in fact, "food." Already not a good sign.

The list of ingredients is long and horrifying, coming right out of the gate with "MECHANICALLY SEPARATED CHICKEN." Oddly enough, I'm about to be separated from my lunch, and I haven't even opened the can yet.

Other ingredients include BEEF TRIPE, BEEF HEARTS, AND "PARTIALLY DE-FATTED COOKED PORK FATTY TISSUE" How does one de-fat fat? Bizarre. God knows what else is in here.

Okay, I'm going to go try it now. If i'm not back in ten minutes, call Poison Control...

I'm back. Oofah.

Okay, here we go-- Pulling back the lid (not recommended) lets loose an odor that punches you in the nose like a stinky fist. If you've ever smelled a can of dog food, it's just like that. Only imagine you are opening the can while your head is wedged in a horse's ass.

Inside is a smooth, oddly pink meat paste. So smooth, in fact, I dare call it "creamy." (I actually got a little gaggy just typing that.) Surprisingly, it was a little spicier than I expected. Although, that sensation may have been a by-product of my tastebuds dying.

The can shows a serving suggestion of the Potted Meat being served on squares of toast. I would also suggest squares of toilet paper. Or maybe a nice diaper.

All I can tell you is, I survived the first installment of "Steve, Don't Eat It." And I have to admit it may have even been a little educational. I know I learned at least one thing from "Ralph's Potted Meat"-- Ralph is a ****ing dick.

Not surprisingly, I've come up with a little slogan the peeps who handle Potted Meat Marketing can use (no charge, as always): POTTED MEAT FOOD PRODUCT: Made By, For, And With Assholes.

[Fushigi na Renamon]

Pulling back the lid (not recommended) lets loose an odor that punches you in the nose like a stinky fist. If you've ever smelled a can of dog food, it's just like that. Only imagine you are opening the can while your head is wedged in a horse's ass.

Ewwww, that's horrible! :lol

Nix, I look forward to seeing more weird food reviews. :)

[finalfantasyFReak789]

I'm glad I read about that potted meat before I ate breakfast... Now I can keep all the food inside of me today :D

[Redneck 2000]

I love Marshmallow Cones! And Fruit Leather! Two of the finest delicacies. :D

[The_Real_Crunk]

I was always wondering what flavor those feet shaped jelly candies where. You can usually find them in any store that sells penny candies in those big bulk bins.

I eventually found out they were cherry. WHO THE HELL MAKES FEET SHAPED CANY THAT TASTES LIKE CHEERIES?!

[The Toecutter]

So, Nixon, ever give the 'Potted Meat' a try? Mmmmm. Meat.

[Nixon]

Hell no. Everybody already knows that potted meat sucks. I'm breaking NEW GROUND!!!

[Snarf]

EvilNix, have you happened to try this yet:

http://store1.yimg.com/I/candywarehouse_1845_22746803
Ghosts have been prowling around the candy shop.... leaving sweet droppings for everyone to enjoy!

Box contains 24 Ghost Poop treat bags, each with a net weight of 0.75 ounces.


If so, what did you think of it? If not, I would like a critique. I will even buy it for you.

[Vonwert]

Hmm....The only poop in a bag I wouldn't mind having on my front porch :)

[Nixon]

I would gladly try this "ghost poop," but it appears to be nothing more than a bag of minature marshmallows. :lol

Someone saw a clever business opportunity! I wouldn't want you to waste your hard-earned money on it.

I'll see if I can find some new weird treats at the store later on today.

[Riotsword]

Ah, "Ghost Poop". My mom made several variations on this last X-mas.One was, a jar of "Snowman Poop", just like the aforementioned ectoplasmic fecal matter, and the other was a jar of chocolate covered peanuts, called "Reindeer Poop". LOLZORZ :|

[Nixon]

Okay~

I have no idea what this is called so I looked it up.

Kinoko Takenoko:
http://www.asianfoodgrocer.com/snacks/meiji/638570.jpg

I'm not sure I really trust these happy cartoon animals.

It's a four pack of japanese cookies that seem very similar to pocky.

The chocolate mushrooms are alright. But I could've bought some YAN YAN and had the exact same thing. The strawberry/vanilla mushrooms... eugh... not very good. In fact, I'm not eating anymore of those. The strawberry... uh.. cone thingys aren't much better... bleh... the chocolate ones are still merely average.

Next time I'll buy something without DRUG ABUSING ANIMALS on the front of the package.

4/10

EDIT- COUNTERPOINT!

I fed some to Dave.

He quickly ate what was left of both bags of the strawberry snacks, and declared them to be "good." He tried some of the chocolate and seemed to enjoy it. He said it has a funky aftertaste.

His rating: 8/10!

[RPGD]

http://www.videogamesprites.net/Earthbound/Bosses/4%20-%20Shrooom!%20(Rainy%20Circle).gifhttp://www.videogamesprites.net/Earthbound/Bosses/4%20-%20Shrooom!%20(Rainy%20Circle).gifhttp://www.videogamesprites.net/Earthbound/Bosses/4%20-%20Shrooom!%20(Rainy%20Circle).gif

[Riotsword]

Shrooom!

[pinkymadigan]

Japanese candy rules. I don't dig american candy, it hurts my teeth it's so sweet. But Japanese candy always has this mellow milky flavor to it. Much better.

[Snarf]

I tried this before

http://store1.yimg.com/I/animenation_1847_109832646

tasted like ass though.

[Translucid]

Dunno if this has already been posted, but Funky Fries (french fries covered in chocolate) simply sound nasty.
http://money.cnn.com/2003/06/17/news/companies/failed_food/funkyfries.jpg
The last time I saw them was at a dollar mart about 6 months ago. They've stopped producing them, thank god.

[Fushigi na Renamon]

Funky Fries? Eeeew! :lol

I've actually had the super lemon candies, Snarf. They certainly are sour. @_@

[Nixon]

I will be going to the store soon... I promise I will return with something weird and/or disgusting to sample for your amusement.

[Lone Phantom]

Here's a new distusting new food Items I made.

Fried peanut butter and banana with raisins and cinimon

Hotdog roasted in garlic, then slathered with baked beans.

[Valkysas]

WHY?

[Nixon]

It's all well and good to make your own, but I'm trying out stuff that people actually took the time to mass produce/manufacture.

So go out there, find a bag of some weird-ass looking candy, and just EAT IT!

[Lone Phantom]

heres some wierd foods I found on a website I thought about trying.


someone else wrote this, I just copied and pasted it.

Giant Barnacle (USA): At Alma de Cuba
in Philadelphia, I had the opportunity to eat a giant barnacle.
It was as big as a softball, but shaped like a volcano.
The shell was bright white and the "beak"
(which is removed to get to the animal inside)
is replaced after cooking. (Kind of like a lid).
The consistency and color is that of a very light egg soufflé, very delicate.
The flavor is its own (no, it does not taste like chicken!)
but it wasn't fishy at all nor salty; very ocean-like and fresh.
There was also a light breadcrumb topping under the beak.
It was absolutely delicious and if I ever have the opportunity to try it again,
I definitely will!


Dancing Shrimp (China): Large live shrimp are taken from a tank and
plopped into a scalding hot
clear soup broth and served with a side of red pepper paste. Shrimp
prepared in this way are usually
served in a large glass bowl with a lid. They need the lid because
they bring them to the table quickly
and the shrimp are still "kicking" and jerking. You bite right into
the shells and bodies with your teeth
and chew the meat out and then spit out the shells and legs and such.
I couldn't bring myself to eat one since I had just seen them moving.

[Lone Phantom]

I tried this before

http://store1.yimg.com/I/animenation_1847_109832646

tasted like ass though.


but have you ever tasted ass is the question, becuase if you have not,
then it does not.

[Nixon]

Let's stick to stuff like this:

Gummi hot dogs and hamburgers-
http://www.mckandy.com/images/971
http://www.mckandy.com/images/1697

I actually bought a package of both for $1.00.

They are just like regular gummi treats, despite the many odd colors. This batch was fresh and thus more tasty. Some of the gummi stuff is that more "marshmallow" type gummi. Some people might be turned off, but not me. This was well worth my dollar.

8/10

[Translucid]

EDIT: dammit, would you THINK before posting things like this?

-Valk

didn't think it was that bad, but sorry

[Nixon]

What is that? Some sort of alcoholic beverage?

[RPGD]

Nope. Appears to be flavored paste.

[Translucid]

I believe it's some kind of fruit co cktail.
*deftly sidesteps swear filter*

[Nixon]

I like the packaging. I'd love to send some of that stuff to my up-tight religious friends. Hell, I'd try some if it was at the store. How can you pass that up? :lol

EDIT - I thought it wasn't that bad, Valk. Sorry.

[The Toecutter]

Aww. I missed it. What was it?

[Nixon]

Neat german "beverage" (or something) packaged in a penis-shaped tube thingy.... dealy...

[Loki]

We sell those gummy hotdogs and hamburgers at work. But today we got the new item in the series.

http://store1.yimg.com/I/candywarehouse_1847_78920148

Gummy tacos. Gummy. Tacos.

As if eating spongy tacos wasn't strange enough. These proclaim to be both hot and spicy. I thought it was just a marketing trick. But when I tried it I was proven wrong. Hot and Spicy gummies! What will they think of next?

They taste kinda like Ginger candy, but with a gummy-bear type taste and lot stronger in the heat department. The ingredients reveal this is from the presence of chili powder. There's also a lot of sugar in them, and bee's wax. Hey! They're kosher! No cows were killed to make my Hot and Spicy Gummy Tacos. N' that's the way I likes it!

6/10

[The_Real_Crunk]

I must now buy several cases of those. :lol

[Redneck 2000]

I love those hamburger things! I buy huge packs of them when they go on sale. Which is frequently because nobody buys them.

[Nixon]

Cool, Loki, that was a good review!

I'm still kind of wary of the spicy gummi items!

[Snarf]

My son loves the gummi hamburger things. I guess they are all the rage with the kids. I went to his valentine thing at school and it seemed that thats what everyone was passing out.

I guess if you really think about it, gummi worms are far more gross.

[Nixon]

Up next:

BOTAN RICE CANDY~
http://www.candywrappermuseum.com/cr_botanricea.jpg

I'm really not sure what to make of this, but the lucky cat meant I had to give it a try.

Here goes.

Uhhhhhh.... hmmm.... what the hell is this? How can I describe it? Chewy jellybean/gum like substance that tastes kind of sweet, kind of lemony.... this is really strange stuff. Not terrible, but not terribly good, either.... certainly different, I'll give it that. Getting to eat the inside (edible) wrapper is a plus, but doesn't change the final rating.

5/10

[Redneck 2000]

Yeah, a lot of Japanese candy tastes like lemon. I guess lemon is the "hip" flavor over there.

And what "free amusing toy" did it come with!?

[Nixon]

My box actually says "free children's sticker inside" but even that was a lie. Inside the box was a decent temporary tattoo of a somewhat stylized butterfly.

The pictures on the box led me to believe it would be either a cat, a race car, an elephant or a flower. If it had been a cool picture of a dung beetle or something crazy I might have added an extra point.

[Lone Phantom]

One candy I found was at walgreens, Regal Dynasties.

[Nixon]

What kind of candy was it (chocolate, fruit, etc)?
Did you try it?

[Lone Phantom]

yea,it tastes like chicken,no I'm kidding ,but yes it is a chocolate,filled
with what I can't really tell,but I think it is a vanilla truffle.and the truffle is filled with some kind of white cream.

[Fushigi na Renamon]

Has anyone ever had Willy Wonka's "Thrills" gum? It tastes like soap. It even advertises that fact. :|

[RPGD]

I like Willy Wonka stuff.

[Nixon]

I tried those damn jellybelly beans that tasted like random horrible garbage. That was enough for me.

NEWS FLASH: NOBODY LIKES THE TASTE OF SOAP. :lol

[neobi]

I tried those damn jellybelly beans that tasted like random horrible garbage. That was enough for me.

NEWS FLASH: NOBODY LIKES THE TASTE OF SOAP. :lol

Hey I thought soap was the best one, I could actually eat those. Grass was atleast descent too. Go for the worm/grass/dirt combo! I did, mmmm just like going out and eating a chunk of soil. The only one I didn't try in my box was sardine...I hate seafood the way it is.

[Nixon]

Wow, I stand corrected. I thought most of their awful flavors were just that. I'm not sure what the draw was, because I avoided them like the plague.

My boss purchased a bag and thought it would be funny to have me sample them for her. I pelted her with them afterwards, from various places in the store (and I'm a crack shot).

[RPGD]

Hehe, crack.

Gobstoppers forever!

[Nixon]

I pegged one of my old managers from across the entire store, and through the shelves in the back area. Smacked him right in the side (near his ass) with some sort of small squishy dog toy.

That's a "crack shot."

[Gustaff 13]

I liked Thrills gum. Mmm soapy.

Rena once had halloween monster gumballs. The pumpkin design was full of candy seeds, the vampire design had red cherry blood. That was pretty keen.

[RPGD]

Nah, I know what a crackshot is (er, uh, crack shot. yeah.)

But I WAS serious about the gobstoppers!

:minotaur

[Nixon]

I bought some more Botan rice candy. This time I got a badass tiger tattoo.

Adjusted score:

7/10

[Conner999]

"NEWS FLASH: NOBODY LIKES THE TASTE OF SOAP."

Have you seen the Willy Wonka movie? He made some trick candy "to give to your enemies." That must be one of them. ;)

Kids seem to like those nasty jelly beans because they're gross. "I Just ate sardine vomit ear wax!" Someone bet $5 that I wouldn't eat vomit. They lost $5. (It seriously tasted like vomit.. So nasty.)

[The Toecutter]

I found something right at home for you:

Tex-ASS beer jelly (http://www.moonlightnet.com/catalog/texas_beer_jelly_3593715.htm)

[Nixon]

:lol We'll put alcohol in everything.

This actually sounds like it could be tasty... I should wager 6 bucks and find out.

[RPGD]

Is anyone near that one restaurant that makes that monstrous "HamDog" brave enough to give it a try? It's 1200 calories and over 90 grams of fat.

[Nixon]

We call it the "good morning burger."
http://www.driko.org/blogicons/homer_drool.jpg

[RPGD]

Lemme break this behemoth down for ya:

It's a large wiener wrapped in hamburger meat, fried, topped with chili, cheese, bacon, grilled onions and a fried egg served in a hot dog bun.

It also comes with a side of fries. Costs $9.

http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2005-02-13-southernfood-health_x.htm

Heheh.

[The Toecutter]

Given that meat is from American cattle, I can't help but wonder about the risk of BSE infection.

[Caciss]

Yeah, okay Terr.

[Nixon]

That's disgusting alright. :p Sounds like something Dave would create if he had a stocked kitchen.

Oh, and I got a wacky new food item that I'll sample later on. It's not candy, it's just SCARY!

[The Toecutter]

Scary...

I'm dying to know what it is. Valk's girlfriend drank the juice out of a can of Vienna sausages. Is it worse than that?

[Nixon]

I don't know. I used to eat vienna sausages, so I might be biased. You tell me.

It's this:
http://store1.yimg.com/I/yhst-12909172288733_1849_802950

[The Toecutter]

Mmmmm! I love squid! That looks tasty.

[Nixon]

There were two different kinds, spicy and normal. I figured I would try normal first, since I've had enough spicy food for today.

[RPGD]

Huzzah! Another squid lover! How do you like 'em?

[Caciss]

At first, I thought the line, "Prepared Squid," said, "Powederd Squid." If only.

[Nixon]

I'll try it later. I just ate a bunch of chinese food and some fried wontons. :D

[The Toecutter]

I like my squid fried. Mmmmm. Kalimari is delicious...

[RPGD]

I have a hard time deciding whether I prefer raw or fried... it's practically apples and oranges, though. I love my fried with marinara.

[Nixon]

I think the fried stuff is better than this.

The review:

Saki Ika dried squid~
http://store1.yimg.com/I/yhst-12909172288733_1849_802950

BLEEEUGH? That's what I thought at first. This squid tastes kind of odd. Not too bad, if you're a jerky fan. Has a nice sweetness to it that's enjoyable. I'm thinking the spicy stuff would probably taste better, though. Leaves a funky aftertaste. Kinda stringy and chewy.

6/10

[The Toecutter]

Squid makes the best smelling farts in the world. Spicy would give them a little zing to the smell.

[The_Real_Crunk]

Terr, that "Hamdog" things right up your ally. :lol

The squid snacks looks pretty strange. But how can you not trust the happy expression of the squid on the package!

[The Toecutter]

It certainly looks tasty, I'll give it that. I'm just a bit wary of the meat sold in the U.S. given the current practices of the major agribusinesses at the moment.

Here's another interesting food item for Nixon to try:

http://mdn.mainichi.co.jp/photospecials/0207/ice-cream/images/3.jpg

Octopus Ice Cream!

[RPGD]

Two gallons, please.

[Hyper Dingo]

Good god i didnt think that jelly beans could be so rancid! I'm talking about the Bertie Botts every flavor jelly beans. Some of the odd flavours i can stomach like Bacon, Grass, Earthworm, Dirt and Soap. But rotten egg was so horrendous that i had to spit it out instantly. Same goes for Vomit. Booger and Sardine were horribly salty XD Definetly get a pack though!

[Loki]

Ugh. I've never tryed Berttie Botts and I never will. The prospect of getting a Earthworm flavored been sends my stomach churning.

Also, in the books, the idea of every flavor beens was cool. In real life it's just a lame marketing ploy.

Alot of the Harry Potter stuff is crap. Like, for the release of the new book I've seen bookstores selling a special "Harry Potter" Booklight. Wee. It's a booklight. Not a big deal, but they are also selling special booklight cases seperatly, all with different house crests on them. "Collect them all!" proclaims the display! Yes, I must get five different cases for my booklight! Here's all my money! I won't need it 'cause I'll be able to read in the dark and keep my light cozy five diferent ways!

Ugh.

[Nixon]

RESURRECTION!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v89/Nixon/gill-resurrection.gif

Let's try red bull from Thailand! Right now!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v89/Nixon/DSCF2652a.jpg

EDIT - It's not carbonated... and it's like drinking some sort of horrible concentrated snow cone syrup. Bwagh.

Guh... the taste lingers...

A while back I tried this thing:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v89/Nixon/img091.jpg

I probably wouldn't eat that mystery food again.

[JPS]

Whered you get Red Bull from Thailand at? And how old is it:lol

Its probably a few years past the expiration date and have been thrown around quite a bit.

It probably came from Thailand's Floating Market
http://img259.imageshack.us/img259/6686/thaimarketnr6.jpg

[Goufunaki]

I've never even tried a red bull from here in the states. :p

I like some of the commercials, though. :happy

It probably came from Thailand's Floating Market

It's probably the water. Just scoop it up, seal the cap, and sell! :happy

[JPS]

I've never even tried a red bull from here in the states. :p

Its horrible, tastes like they canned bull p**s and put it on the market:lol

My opinion, please no negs:lol

[Nixon]

The red bull came directly from Thailand. A friend of mine went there recently, so I'm pretty sure it's "fresh." The expiration date on the bottle is 2009. :p

At least now I can say I've tried it.

[Ωbright]

A while back I tried this thing:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v89/Nixon/img091.jpg

I probably wouldn't eat that mystery food again.

All I know is that that is BEAN PASTE in there. UGH...no sweetened legumes for me, please. A friend of mine came back from Japan with some candy that was brown. I thought 'MMm! Chocolate!' and ate one.

I was Wrong.

[Nixon]

The beany substance was surrounded by some sort of foam-like cake... it was all very strange.

I like trying out weird foreign snacks, even if they suck.

Here's some candy(?) I got with a play-asia order a while back.
I deemed it "edible."
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v89/Nixon/wth6.jpg

[Goufunaki]

didn't even notice they had snacks at play-asia. o_O

[Nixon]

They just send random stuff with orders, too.

[Goufunaki]

oh, ok. Only random item I ever got when I first ordered from them was a Dead Rising sticker.

Nothing since then. :(

[gray]

i have tried red bull. american red bull. tastes fine, but it's not my thing.



i recently drank a concoction, apparently designed to counter dehydration, that tasted like salted gatorade




i wasn't a fan

[Sezjeuric]

I am a normally hyper person, hence the "Chipmunk on crack" nickname. I normally drink diet pop, and today I had a regular soda and was bouncing off the walls at work.

I always get asked "How much coffee" I have had at work, but I have never had it- I tell customers I would go into cardiac arrest if I ever drank it.

I'll never forget the first time I had red bull. I got off work at 10pm on a weeknight (while living in Orillia) and didn't want to go home to my relatives who were sleeping, and my then boyfriend also had an early night due to school, so I thought, "Why not make the 20 minute drive to Barrie?".

I went to fill up my car and saw Red Bull, and thought, "What the heck"....

20 minutes later I was following a limo through Barrie, so excited that I was going to meet a celebrity. The closer we got to Toronto though, the more I realzied I had no idea how to drive home. So I stopped and turned around.

Yeah, there is another energy drink story, but I punch back into work in 7.5 hours and I am crashing...........