"In America" (Parental Advisory)

[Bon]

Verse One

In America, it’s “the land of the free
Home of brave”; a country that we just won’t leave
Cause to be elsewhere would be a downgrade
To be away from Old Glory and all its shade

But we’re paying damn near 4 dollars for gas
Plus our currency’s decline is a kick in the ass
I think it’s time we return to the past
The future’s looking dim
How long can this ignorance last? (I mean...)

Hook

You can make trips in America
Buy your lover gifts in America
You can work long shifts in America
But that doesn’t mean **** in America
You can break any law in America
But our system’s really flawed in America
We got a big glitch in America
You can even be a ***** in America

Verse Two

I read an article, and it made me sick
A chick got a few months for a crime that she did
She cried rape; later, she reneged that ****
An innocent man’s rep got ruined from this!

I think the system’s ****ed up with this child support
Giving kids to the mom, so rules the court
And if the man can’t pay, he goes to prison
So please listen, we need to correct this living (I mean...)

Hook

You can make trips in America
Buy your lover gifts in America
You can work long shifts in America
But that doesn’t mean **** in America
You can break any law in America
But our system’s really flawed in America
We got a big glitch in America
You can even be a ***** in America

Verse Three

Our country’s made mistakes, but where to begin
For starters, we voted in Bush again
We invested billions of dollars in war
To find an enemy we have yet to destroy

And that’s Osama; we need to end this drama
The nation’s still split for Hill and Obama
We gotta cease the errors, man; it’s buffoonery
America will cease to exist without unity

Hook

You can make trips in America
Buy your lover gifts in America
You can work long shifts in America
But that doesn’t mean **** in America
You can break any law in America
But our system’s really flawed in America
We got a big glitch in America
You can even be a ***** in America

EDIT: Tweaked the hook and one of the verses. This was how I recorded it in song.

[Caciss]

Re: "In America" (Parental Advisory)

A lot of lines feel pretty stilted.

For example:

You can make trips in America
Buy your lover gifts in America
You can work long shifts in America
But that doesn’t mean **** in America
You can break laws in America
But the system’s real flawed in America
We got a big glitch in America
You can even be a ***** in America

Especially following the previous line. If you took out real it might flow better, but I still think the line is kind of lame. Also looks like you were really fishing for more lines in the second half of the hook.

I think the system’s ****ed up with this child support
Giving kids to the mom, so ruled the court
And if the man can’t pay, he goes to prison
So please listen, we need to correct this living

That whole stanza feels really off to me too.

I dunno, the whole rhythm feels pretty off to me.

[Chad]

Re: "In America" (Parental Advisory)

I really like the first four lines of the hook.

Also though, what Caciss said. Also pretty hard to read verse three.

[Big Rick Cook]

Re: "In America" (Parental Advisory)

If you were famous, a song like this would be forgotten in two or three years when all the stuff you're rapping about is just old news.

In short, why bother?