myyyyyyyy new game come look

[chigoo]

this is the intro to my brand new game




Shadow knightz
Last of the knightz





The shadow knights were feared by all the evil race with god like power ruled he earth but then the people of outfort banded the leak of 5 each with any army of a 1000 demon brewed from the darkest pith of hell trained to use master fangs marched to the northern gate of the greatest temple that ever
Razed the temple of stangfu the leader of he shadow knights was foretold of the invasion years ago
But this shadow knights were out numbered 5005 to 600 but that did not matter the shadow knight leader sent out a message all over the land to this shadow knight to hide in the shadows around the temple as the leak of 5 approached the temple the leader of the sk sat and waited as the leak of 5 reach their destination o the middle of the temple expecting a fight the thought that the sk has retreated but the were wrong the 5 leader of the leak of 5 slowly approached the gates of then throne
The leader of the shadow knights worked slowly towards them when the reached the outside the gates he says what do you want the leader of the leak all as one to say to end you rain of terror and the rushed out wards to the leader of the sk but before their eyes he disappeared in to the shadow and
Repapered one the roof top of the throne and said you dear challenge me you master now suffer
Then he pulled out his sword and said with this sword that have absolved 80000 human blood and 80000 daemon blood I will slay you all then with one quick slash all the demons and the leader of the leak dissolved in to thin air as this is happening the god and he demons of hell banded o stop this treat that have beheld the earth to end the race of the shadow knights a few moments later darkness fell thought the land as godly rain and fires of hell fell from the sky the leader of the shadow knights knew of this so he ordered this to generals to hide half of this soul in an unborn human child as he carried out their missions the battle of kena has begun the shadow knights fought bravely but hir god like power wear no mach to the gods their self and the demons after the battle the shadow knights fell
Their rain has fallen to extinction 5 years after the battle the baby was born and the race of the shadow knights has begun anew

[chigoo]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

i forgot post what you think about this game intro

good
bab
alsome
relly bad
stinks
the best i have ever raed

[lil_das]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

JESUS!
SO MANY TYPOS!
I CANNOT EVEN READ WHAT YOU ARE SAYING!

[Seraph]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

I don't really have a problem with spelling errors, but you really need to use some punctuation if you want anyone to read this.

You made an entire paragraph of run-on sentences, and I don't even want to read it.

[Duel]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

Sounds pretty cliche to me.

[chigoo]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

i see what you mean.
but thats how the stroy is is those old kind of text and im doing it completly out of VFX you see what the game comes out


any way

after 15 years from when the leader of the shadow knights was reborned he recoved this memorys of the grate battle and this pasted life now he has to blend in with the people of outfort untile he recovers his blade(the blade of the shadows)for if he people of outfort disscovers his identiy the will not allow him o draw breat the will surely and his live


and that the hole intro of my game i dont have my ps2 right now so im not ganna start on it for at least 3 more days and im still planeing it

and i dont like to .?!",' so lay off

[lil_das]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

Oh my god. If you do not learn how to spell this game will be horrendous.

[chigoo]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

IM 13 SO I DONT KNOW HOW TO SPELL THAT MUCH BUT I GET 100S ONE MY
SPELLING BECAUSE I MEMORIZED THE 10 WORD AND THIR DEFINION THEN AFTER THE TEST I JUST FORGET ALL OF IT LIKE THE SCEOND THE TEST IS OVER SO IM GO WITH MEMORIZEING BUT QUICK TO FORGET

[Libby]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

STOP ABUSING THE CAPS! It gets annoying and it makes people not like you. I hopefully rewrote it so people can understand what it's saying. Wait a few years when your puberty doesn't control your creative juices and not make a character that feels like he is out of DBZ. People rarely like over powered Mary Stus.

The shadow knights were feared by all the evil races, because of their god-like power. They ruled the earth, but the people of Outfort banding the Leak of Five with an army of One-Thousand demons brewed from the darkest pit of hell. They were trained to use the master fangs, and marched on the norther gate of the greatest temple that ever existed. They razed the temple of Stangfu, leaving nothing behind.

The leader of the shadow knights had been foretold of the invasion years ago, but still the shadow knights were outnumbered. The demons had an army of 5005 evil souls, while the Knights numbered only 500. Still, despite all odds, the leader of the Shadow Knights sent a message throughout the lands for a plan to defeat the demons.

He instructed his Knights to lay in shadows amongst the Temple Grounds, to await the Leak of Five. As the Leak approached the temple, the Shadow Knight's Leader sat in wait. As the enemy reached their destination expecting a fight, they had found the temple empty. Thinking that the Knights had retreated, they let their guard down as they approached the gates.

The Leader of the Shadow Knights greeted them, walking slowly when they reached the outer walls of the temple. He challenged them, asking them their intentions.

They simply responded "To end your reign of terror, Leader of the Shadow Knights!" Their own leader rushed to attack the Leader of the Shadow Knights, but he disappeared into darkness.

His voice echoed, "You challenge me? Your master will now suffer!" He appeared upon the roof of the throne keep, in his hands a glittering sword. In a challenging tone he declared,"With this sword, that has tasted and tainted the blood of 160,000 humans and demons alike, I will slay you!"

It took barely a slash to banish the Leader of the Leak and his followers. Watching from his perch far below, the God of Hell and his demons wailed in the loss of their armies, and swore to stop the threat of the Shadow Knights. The God Of Hell's wraith fell from the sky in acidic rain and burning hellfire. The following war of Kena consumed the remaining of the Shadow Knights into darkness, though they fought valiantly and bravely. Their near god-like power shown no equal to that of the God of Hell. Sensing their final end, and to continue the line of the Knights, the leader fragmented his soul and bade his generals to hide half in soul in the unborn child.

Five years later, the Shadow Knights fell into extinction. Yet, five years later, a baby is born that promises that the race of the Shadow Knights still survives. A past sin that has begun anew.

*****
For 15 years, the fragmented soul of the Leader of the Shadow Knights lay dormant until a catalyst triggered the memories to life. Fighting his old memories as they conflict with the new, he has to hide within the people of Outfort, until he recovers his blade and his full memories. But everywhere is a danger, and if he is discovered, the same people who raised him will make sure he never draws another breath.

Does that sound about right?

[chigoo]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

thanks for the repost of my makeing it better

[Libby]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

No problem. Sometimes having someone older and more experienced helps. As silly as it sounds, you can always talk to your parents about having them help you with the basic mechanics of grammar. And before you use large words, make sure you run them through a dictionary (like www.dictionary.com ) to make sure you have the right context. Using absolved in the manner that you did makes it sound kinda silly.

[chigoo]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

oh and the are evil you made it sound like thir good and the evil races feard them the shadow knights themself are evil
and the part with the god of hell that part right is not only the god of hell is also the god of heaven the both feared his power so
the banded a treaty to end him before the leader of the sk try to challange them

[chigoo]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

oh how do you stop an auto event from runing agin and agin

[Libby]

Re: myyyyyyyy new game come look

oh and the are evil you made it sound like thir good and the evil races feard them the shadow knights themself are evil
and the part with the god of hell that part right is not only the god of hell is also the god of heaven the both feared his power so
the banded a treaty to end him before the leader of the sk try to challange them

Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.