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X-COM: NOOB CANNON. (I UPDATED HURRR DURRRF)

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    X-COM: NOOB CANNON. (I UPDATED HURRR DURRRF)

    ---BEGIN DATA TRANSFER---

    Hello, my name is Roy Mitchell, former director of the infamous, and now defunct, X-COM project. I had initially started this journal as a record to save me work in case The Council ever needed an in depth report, and as a means to organize my thoughts, but it now seems that the information within may hold the last slim chance for our species' survival. I can only pray that someone will receive this, that at least one of my attempts to upload it to a secure database went undetected by the enemy.

    Below you will find all the information we were able to learn of our enemy, exhaustive research on reverse engineering their technology, and a detailed account of how X-COM came to betray humanity, ultimately setting us on the path to extinction. My time is short, I can elaborate no further; read the journal, and may you not make the same mistakes I have.


    -----


    *BEGIN RECORDING*


    Thursday, September 3rd, 1998.

    We're only a few months away from X-COM's central command going online. Despite the dire circumstances, I have to admit I'm quite excited. When The C.F.N. first approached me to head their new "Extraterrestrial Combat Unit" I was apprehensive. I had been retired from the military for nearly 6 years, and doubted my ability to oversee such an unconventional operation. Now though, after touring the new facilities, I can feel the old war dog in me starting to growl. The failures of both Japan's Kiryu-Kai, and Germany's Außerirdische Mörder don't hurt either; they give me the opportunity to show what can be accomplished when you put an American in charge of your forces.

    The Council of Funding Nations recently sent me floor plans of CentCom to go over, I'll save them here just in case I ever want to reminisce about how we started out:



    They decided to place the center under Mt. Mitchell in the Carolinas in my honor, how sweet. Although I assume it was actually to protect Washington. The United States made a big deal of pointing out that they provided more funding than any other nation in The Council, and that they clearly deserved the quickest response time from X-COM's experimental fighter jets.

    On the topic of air defense, Japans sent over two of their remaining Kiryu fighters. Our engineers have been hard at work overhauling their design, and have rechristened them Interceptors.



    They also managed to design a new aerial transport in their spare time. I'm feeling good about these guys, I see great things in their future.



    It's a stunning achievement considering the limited time they've had to work. However, there is one problem, this new troop transport highlights our distinct lack of troops. Regardless of all the money they're throwing at us The C.F.N. seems reluctant to supply us from their own armies, some bull**** about not wanting to compromise civil defense. We've had to initiate an aggressive recruitment program, advertisements promising wealth and glory, recruiters in major cities around the world. Hopefully we can find some people brave, crazy, or stupid enough to wage war against aliens. I wonder which applies to me?

    Mitchell, out.


    *END RECORDING*




    Fresh on the heels of my humiliating failure at trying to do a communal play through of Fallout 2, I bring you X-COM: UFO Defense.

    I'm going to attempt to create something of a story around a game that has about 10 lines of text devoted to it's in game narrative, and I need you. Earth needs you. I'm asking for volunteers to apply for service in X-COM. I need 8-10 grunts, and one person to man our Heavy Weapons Platform(tank) at the moment. There's nowhere near as much involvement needed as fallout 2, all I need is for you to let me throw you into the story, and probably get you slaughtered in combat.

    If you want to sign up just say so, and you can specify what kind of gear you want to bring into combat. It's first come first serve as far as the Heavy Weapons platform goes, though. There's a few of you that if you sign up, I have specific plans for. Dingo, Caciss, and IRC being part of those few.

    We currently have access to Rifles, Pistols, Auto-Cannons, Heavy-Cannons, Rocket Launchers, Grenades, Stun Sticks(cattle prods used for bringing in aliens alive), and Medkits for those of you altruistic enough to risk your lives rushing to help a wounded comrade.

    If this has enough interest to get a full squad I'll proceed with the next update.
    Last edited by Garr123; 09-16-2007, 07:25 AM.
    "At first it just looked like a picture of a bunch of lily pads, but then I started scraping at it with my pocket knife and the whole painting just sort of spoke to me," Schmidt said. "For the first time, I finally understand what Monet was trying to get across in her work."

    #2
    Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

    Sign me up.

    I'll take a rifle, grenades and some decent armor, once you do enough research.

    I'd like to request that my character have strong psionic abilities (or at least enough to get by), because nothing ****** me off more than soldiers that freak out in the middle of a battle.
    Eat Smello.

    Comment


      #3
      Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

      I'm game.

      Gimme a f***ing rocket launcher, medkits, armor, and a nice cold can of Dew.
      Screenshot Let's Plays

      Comment


        #4
        Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

        I'd like to enlist, sir!

        Heavy Weapons Platform man at your service :3 Load me up with a rifle or whatever's left.
        Last edited by DK; 09-16-2007, 12:16 PM.

        Comment


          #5
          Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

          Sounds interesting.

          Gimme some grenades, light armor for mobility, and a rifle.
          http://www.youtube.com/user/Goufunaki

          Comment


            #6
            Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

            This sounds cool. I'd like a stun stick, medkits, and a rifle (sniper if you can swing that.)

            Comment


              #7
              Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

              I don't want to do it.
              Last edited by IRC; 09-16-2007, 04:51 PM.
              The Cyclops having only one eye, needed to seek shelter from the harsh sun. The shadow cast by the spheres gave him temporary respite.

              Comment


                #8
                Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

                I haven't seen any pistol love yet. Give me one of those.
                bring your own booyah.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

                  Signed up.

                  Don't need weapons!
                  Last edited by Caciss; 09-16-2007, 02:38 PM.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

                    *salutes*

                    I want to give this a try.

                    Medkits x 10, Stun Stick, and light armor.

                    Call me The Doctor.
                    Last edited by Red Dragon; 09-16-2007, 04:44 PM.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

                      I would like a pistol, and a stunstick, and a medkit, please.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

                        A rifle, a pistol and a medkit for me, if that's at all possible.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

                          Is there a mod that lets me be Bill Paxton?
                          The Cyclops having only one eye, needed to seek shelter from the harsh sun. The shadow cast by the spheres gave him temporary respite.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

                            So is this a role playing game like DND or something?

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Re: X-COM is now recruiting: THE EARTH NEEDS YOU.

                              Me! Me! Choose me!


                              I like auto-cannons.

                              "Couch co-op is the only true co-op." Richard of the Cooks.

                              Comment

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