POEM: Perfect for me

[d2king10]

~Perfect for me~


-there was once a time,
a time of silence,
a time I felt nothing but alone,
i would close my eyes,
and hear nothing but my aching soul,
dreaming of unthinkable fantasies,
and wishing for those dreams to be...
but now i stand here,
my beating heart covering the silence,
and i smile...
those long awaited wishes,
and those wonderful dreams,
have all returned to me,
but this time they have come true...
all thanks to you,
with your gentle hands,
you hold my heart,
with caring love,
you brought me happiness.
-"The most beautiful girl,"
i whisper into her ear,
"Your eyes are like the heavens,
filled with warmth and love,"
I whisper as i stare into her eyes,
"your heart beats like mine,
so fast and unstoppable,"
I whisper as i lay my hand on her chest,
"and my love for you grows every day,
never to go away,"
I whisper as i rest her hand on my heart,
"you make everything so much clearer,
never to see another dark day....
that is why i will whisper these final words,
"~you are perfect for me~"

[Czechs Mex]

Re: POEM: Perfect for me

[d2king10]

Re: POEM: Perfect for me

Ehh.anyone else wanna mock me...*rolls eyes*

[Czechs Mex]

Re: POEM: Perfect for me

Eh, I don't think I'm mocking you. I'll take kissy-lovey over angsty any day. The actual poem is pretty decent, although different from the kind of stuff I usually read. I'm kind of a fan of distancing oneself from what's written, but hey, whatever works for you, go with it.

You should post more maybe.

[d2king10]

Re: POEM: Perfect for me

Thanks for the comment. Yea, my poems are different then what most poems are. I would post more, but nobody usually replys to my topics so i just kinda give up haha

[altoecko]

Re: POEM: Perfect for me

Yeah they do that, don't let it get you down keep posting your poems. I think you wrote that with a lot of emotion in it. I don't really condone the use of Quotation marks in a free form poem. I don't know why but I've always tried to avoid them in these cases because it screws with the flow of the poem. It's a very nice poem but the flow of it is very jolted. I do love the message behind it though.

[d2king10]

Re: POEM: Perfect for me

Yeah they do that, don't let it get you down keep posting your poems. I think you wrote that with a lot of emotion in it. I don't really condone the use of Quotation marks in a free form poem. I don't know why but I've always tried to avoid them in these cases because it screws with the flow of the poem. It's a very nice poem but the flow of it is very jolted. I do love the message behind it though.

Yes, i tend to write all my poems with a lot of emotion. And about the quotes, i agree, ill try and get better with that as i get better at writting poems. Ive only been writting poems for a year now, so i guess they are alright for not being very experienced. thanks for your comment!